ConceiveAbilities - Egg Donation & Surrogacy Agency

As a premier egg donation and surrogacy agency, ConceiveAbilities is dedicated to providing the tools and support to simplify what can sometimes be a difficult and daunting journey to parenthood. ConceiveAbilities helps guide intended parents, gestational surrogates and egg donors in Colorado, Illinois, Texas, and several other states across the country, through an often complex process. With a staff that includes former egg donors, gestational surrogates, and intended parents, ConceiveAbilities has the unique perspective to provide all sides of the partnership with the best resources, support, and information to maximize the overall chance for success. For more information, please visit http://www.conceiveabilities.com

Surro Files - Life After Surrogacy

It's been 3 weeks since Baby P was born.  Wow!  Is that it?  For some reason it feels like it has been way longer than that.  Maybe it is because I'm always busy and don't have time to think about the time that has passed.  I've never been one for sitting around and doing nothing.  There's always a project to be done!  

So other than busy, how has my life been?  That's actually the number one question I've received lately... "How are you doing Chana?"  The funny thing is, I've realized that I've taken this question the wrong way most of the time.  When people ask me how I'm doing I automatically think they mean physically.  "I'm doing great!" I say.  Despite this being the biggest baby I've birthed, I think I bounced back to my old self the fastest out of any birth that I've had.  I don't feel swollen, I feel bright and awake, I didn't tear... what more could I ask for?  Well, I do have a swollen gland that's slightly annoying, and I did have to go through a week of engorged breasts with no baby to relieve them, but overall I feel really great!

That's not what people were asking though.  They were asking how I "feel".  Like really feel... emotionally after this birth.  I know that's been the concern with most people from the beginning.  They didn't understand how someone could not get attached to a baby they've carried for 9 months.  "Won't you be sad?"  "Won't the kids be confused?"  "I could never do that."  I've heard so many things over this year and a half, but it's hard to understand until you've been there.  

From the beginning I knew I would not become attached.  This was not my baby.  I'm just the babysitter, helping a baby grow till they could finally meet their parents.  I knew that the birth and that moment when Belle & Adam were joined with Baby P for the first time would be the most amazing moment ever!  What could be more amazing than knowing that you helped give a gift to a couple that has been waiting for this gift for so long?  Yes, I always knew that moment would be amazing, and it was!

That being said, I did have fears.  Although I always knew that I would not grow attached to Baby P, I did know I would grow attached to Belle, and them as a family in general.  How could I not?  When you talk to someone everyday for so long, you're bound to get attached, and I feared that would all end when Baby P was born.  Not only that, but after putting all my energy and time into this surrogacy for a year and a half, I feared what I would do when it ended.  Like I said before, I always have to be doing something, and what would I do when such a big part of this time in my life was over?  Last, but certainly not least, I feared I would not see the beautiful family that I helped come together after the birth.  You can never predict how one will feel in the moment, and I would have totally understood if after waiting so long to be a family, Belle and Adam decided to bond alone as a family.  But I knew in my heart that I really needed to see their bond to feel complete about our journey together.  It's hard to explain, but I knew that it was really important to see that bond right away.

From the moment Baby P was born I felt amazing.  I will always treasure those first moments I saw them together in the delivery room; skin to skin with big smiles and an instant bond.  We spent nearly an hour in that room before being separated.  It was a perfect ending and beginning all in one.  Belle and I still text almost everyday and she sends pictures full of adorable squishiness all the time.  So although the pregnancy is over, our journey continues on and I can't wait for their trip back to California next winter.  I'm sure it'll be here in the blink of an eye.  I'm also staying very busy.  During the pregnancy I decided to start my own business as a doula.  Thus Love & Labor was born, and getting this business off the ground has definitely kept me busy!  The kids and Brian are also doing great.  They love seeing pictures and hearing updates.  "Sooooo cute!"  That's what the girls think of Baby P.    

So back to the original question, "How am I doing?"  I'm doing great!!!  I feel nothing but joy thinking about these past 9 months and the happy family that is now together.  Lots of love to Belle & Adam, and lots of love to Baby P!!!

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

Surro Files - Looking Back and Looking Forward...

On October 23rd, 2012, I received an e-mail from a friend that I hadn't heard from in awhile.  Belle let me know that she was on her 5th round of IVF and looking into surrogacy as an option to start a family with her husband.  She had great faith that this road would lead them to the child that they so much desired and I just knew that she was right.

On December 25th, 2012, I decided that I wanted to be that surrogate.  Now to convince my husband that this was the right path for us.

On January 26th, 2013, it was decided.  I applied to Circle Surrogacy, and ...

On March 1st, 2013, I was officially matched with Belle and Adam, and our journey had begun.

Our first cycle was cancelled in June.

On August 6th, 2013, We had our first transfer, but it was not successful.

Our third cycle was cancelled in September.

On October 25th, 2013, We had our second transfer, and ...

Fingers Crossed!!!  Babies Are In!!!

On October 29th, 2013, We got our first positive pregnancy test!!!!

Which led to our first positive blood test on November 5th, 2013.

On November 19th, 2013, We found out at our first ultrasound that one baby had hung on and was going strong!

On January 9th, 2014, Belle and I found out Baby P was going to be a girl!  Shhhh!!!  No telling.

Shhhhh!!!!  It's A Girl and She Needs Her Beauty Sleep

Which was later confirmed again at our Gender Ultrasound on January 30th, 2014, and the Anatomy Scan on February 20th, 2014. 

On May 1st, 2014, I threw Belle a baby shower and then we headed off to Disneyland.

Mickey/Minnie Baby Shower & A Trip To Disneyland

On June 25th, 2014, Belle got here to start the wait for Baby P; On July 2nd, 2014, Adam got here to start the wait...

And On July 8th, 2014, Baby P was born!!!!!!

Baby P Is Here!!!!  She shot right into this world.
July 8th, 2014 @ 8:15pm
9lbs 13.6oz    /    21 in

Now here we are on July 15th, 2014, and Belle, Adam, & Baby P are heading home.  I can't believe how fast this past year and a half has went by.  It seems like only yesterday that I was filling out paperwork and meeting up with Belle and Adam for the first time in person talking about their baby to be.  Now their family of two has become a family of three and they've added tons of lifetime friends along the way.  I know we will always consider them an extension of our family that we will never forget and I know they think of us the same.  They've forever changed our lives for the better and I can never thank them enough for that.  I know I've said it several times, but I'll say it again... Thanks so much Belle and Adam for trusting me with the life of your child as she grew and developed into the beautiful little girl that she is today in your arms.  It truly was an honor and I can never thank you enough for that.

And then there were three...

And so now it starts.  First baths, first smiles, her first laugh.  Then she'll be sitting up, crawling, walking, and her first birthday!  Wow!  So many things to look forward to, and I'm so excited that it's all starting for you.  It may have taken awhile to get there, but I know that will only make these moments all the more special and you will cherish each and every one.  I wish I lived closer so I could see your beautiful family grow and grow, but I know you'll send pictures and I can't wait to see you next winter when you visit!!!  Lots of love headed your way and wishing you all the best.  It may be the end of our journey, but it's only the beginning for you three.  Congrats, Congrats, Congrats!!!!  ~ Chana Putnam (the tummy mummy)

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

Surro Files - Baby P Is Here !!!!

Baby P is Here!!!!!

What a week this has been.  It started off with a bang and it's been great ever since.  Due to all the events that have occurred, I'm going to forgo my usual blog template and just dive into the story of how this week went down.  When I left you last we were 39 weeks along with a baby the size of a watermelon.  We had just went to our OB appointment on Monday, found out I was 4-5cm dilated, and had decided to set an induction date so that Adam would have plenty of bonding time and they would have time to file legal paperwork before Adam had to leave.  At the same time, I started to freak out about having an induction instead of going naturally, so I was contemplating my last resort to try and get labor started.  Yep, I went to the store and bought castor oil just in case I got desperate enough to get this party started.

And so that brings us to Tuesday.  I woke up hoping to be in labor.  A twinge, a cramp, anything... nothing.  Oh well.  I knew I couldn't stay pregnant forever.  But I was stressed.  I didn't realize how much differently a surrogacy pregnancy would feel.  You not only have to think about your feelings, fears, and excitement, but you also have those of the parents.  Normally I would anxiously await to go into labor, but as a whole not stress about the big day, knowing that it would eventually come.  It was just a matter of time.  This time however, we had a deadline.  The dad, Adam, was going to need to fly home to take care of a family emergency on our due date (5 days from now).  I was stressed.  Of course the mother would still be here, but I really wanted them both to be here for the birth of their child.  That being said, we had requested just the day before at our OB appointment to schedule an induction as soon as possible.  This would allow the father to be there, and enough bonding time before leaving.  Luckily I was already 4-5 cm dilated with a very soft cervix, so my body was a prime candidate for induction.  So this morning I called the OB's office to get an update on the induction.  Did we have a date set?  Yes!  We did.  It would be the morning of the 9th at 6am.  Eeeeeek!  So soon!!!!!  Excited, but stressed.  Oh so stressed...

Love those baby cheeks!  Heading out to find mommy and daddy.

I soon realized I didn't really want an induction.  Of course they only planned to break my water which is a very non-invasive procedure, but what if that didn't work?  What if I had to have Pitocin?  I didn't want that.  I didn't even want an IV.  I just wanted to give birth as naturally as possible.  And I was scared this wouldn't happen.  Plus I was looking forward to laboring at home for awhile and just working with my doula while relaxing... as much as one can relax while in labor.  It's just not the same when you're hooked up to monitors in a cold sterile hospital.  It just doesn't feel the same.  I read up on alternatives.  I talked with the mother to be.  I talked with my nurse midwife.  I talked with my doula.  She talked with some other midwives.  The consensus was that it couldn't hurt and it's been noted to work with many other women.  It might not be pleasant, but it would probably do the trick.  Hmmm... lots to think about.

Waiting to deliver the placenta.

Later that day I met up with Belle and Adam at the hospital.  We had our last NST and ultrasound scheduled to check on the baby and the fluid that surrounded them.  The ultrasound went great.  We didn't actually get to see the baby, but the fluid was right about where it had been before, and actually went down just a bit to 28.  The NST also went well.  Baby was a bit hard to keep on the monitor, but they sounded strong and healthy, so were were able to leave after about 20 minutes on the monitor.  So weird that we would be back here so soon.  They said the hospital was packed, but since we were the first induction scheduled the next day, we shouldn't have a problem getting a room.  On our way out the parents and I talked about the castor oil again.  We all agreed that it wouldn't hurt to try.  Either we went in tonight if it worked, or we went in tomorrow morning if it didn't.  It was worth a shot!  We'd also decided to have a celebratory dinner.  All of us together one last time before their family grew from 2 to 3.  Eeeeek!  Exciting!

So I made a decision.  I was going to try castor oil to get this labor started before the induction.  It actually didn't taste bad at all.  I made a little smoothie out of it with orange juice, yogurt, and berries; and at 2pm I drank it down.  Yum!  Let's hope it works.  Well, it did work... in the evacuation sense, but I didn't feel anything that would tell me that labor was coming.  Boo!  At least I tried.  At 4:30 I informed the doula that it was not going to work and to just proceed with our induction plans.  She had a few meetings planned for that evening, and I didn't want her to worry about me going into labor.  Brian, the kids, and I all got ready for our dinner date with Belle & Adam, and then headed out.  But then things started to change...

Mommy & Daddy admiring their little girl.

At 5:30, just as we were pulling up to the restaurant, I started getting a dull ache in my back.  Oh no!  I know this dull ache all too well.  I had it with all of my kids when I went into labor.  But maybe I was wrong.  It could just be castor oil after effects.  No need to get all worked up just yet.  So we went in to have dinner.  I did inform the doula and the parents that we might not make it to the induction though.  I wanted us all to be prepared just in case.  We had a nice dinner... still slightly cramping and aching in my back area... plus more evacuation in the restroom (good times), and then we all headed home.  "I'll see you bright and early in the morning" we all said... unless I see you sooner.

All fresh & dressed up for the day

At 7:10 on the car ride home the low back ache continued in a pattern.  I was sure at this point that this was the start of labor and it wasn't going to go away.  So I text the parents and let them know.  I was pretty sure that tonight was going to be the night.  So they said they would get the car seat installed just in case, as soon as they got back to the hotel.  At 7:20 I text again saying that I was still trying to figure out if this was it or not.  At this point I was back on my toilette feeling the effects of the castor oil... and then it happened.  I felt a pop in my stomach and a small gush of fluid.  Did my water just break?  I wasn't sure since I had a VERY high level of amniotic fluid and they warned me it would be a lake, but this was no lake.  Maybe I just pee'd.  But as soon as I stood up, the flow started.  Ok, It definitely broke.  So at 7:25 I text the parents once again to let them know, and they jumped in their car to head to the hospital.  I also informed my doula that my water had broken and we were heading to the hospital.  Now I just needed to figure out how to get off this toilette.

I called out to my husband to help me out and let him know my water had just broken.  Of course he freaked out and instantly wanted to call an ambulance.  "No", I told him.  We can do this.  We just need to get to the hospital which was only 5 minutes down the road.  At this point contractions had come on strong and I didn't know how I would do this, but I worked with my breathing and kept telling myself we could do this.  I just needed to breathe.  At first I tried to use one of my son's diapers to hold the fluid in, but as soon as I stood up it was soaked like I wasn't wearing it at all.  Then my girls brought me a beach towel.  They were very excited that I was in labor.  That is until I had my first contraction in front of them.  My oldest daughter who was keeping me company freaked out and ran to the bathroom that my husband was in telling him he needed to get out here right now.  Haha!  I think I scared her a bit.  But I assured her everything was ok.  My husband loaded up the car, I jumped in (in between contractions), and we sped off to the hospital.  I still hadn't started timing contractions, but I would say they were about 1-2 min apart at this point and very strong.

Yummm!!!  So hungry!!!

We got to the hospital at 8pm and pulled up to the front of the emergency room.  Brian grabbed me a wheelchair and we rolled in to meet up with the parents.  Now I honestly don't know why I even pre-register if they're still going to ask for my ID and ask me to sign papers when I'm sitting there having contractions every minute.  In the end I just couldn't take it anymore and I yelled at them to take me to my room which they finally did.  Of course I had to pass another minor detail though.  They were taking me to triage to make sure I was actually in labor before taking me to a real room.  They asked me to get on a bed and get into a gown, which was easier said than done when I was now having contractions 30 seconds apart.  At that point they asked the parents to leave which we tried to fight, but hospital policy said they couldn't be there till we got to our room.  I was able to get my pants off and lay in the bed, but that's about as far as we got.  I left my tank top on, and just laid the gown over my legs.  They checked my dilation and I was complete.  Then the urge to push came.  As much as they told me to hold it till we got to a room, this baby would not wait.  I yelled for them to get the parents, but they said they couldn't.  I pushed out the baby's head as I slowly guided her out with my hand, and then the nurses all piled on top of me to try and get the shoulders out.  She was a large baby and was not coming out easily, and no doctors were around to assist.  Luckily all went well though.  At 8:15, Baby P was born measuring in at 9lbs 13.6oz and 21 in long.  Wow!  That was a whole lot of baby for me!!!!  Within minutes we were rolling back out of the triage room and down the hall to our room where the parents met up with us and got to meet their baby.  The proud mommy got to do skin to skin time and start breastfeeding the baby right away.  It was an amazing end to an amazing journey.  Well, almost over...

My doula did make it after the baby was born.  I was sad that we didn't get to have the labor that we had planned together, but so happy that she was there for me afterwards.  Because the doctor was not there yet, I had to hold the placenta in for a half hour till she got there.  I wasn't having contractions, but there was a lot of pressure, so the guidance of my doula really helped me to breathe through the pressure.  Finally the doctor arrived and we got all set up, birthed the placenta around 8:45, checked me for tears which I had none, and we were done!  Completely natural without so much as an IV or line put in my arm... just the way I wanted it.  My doula was great and massaged my back to ease the after pains, while my husband took some photos of the happy new parents and then my doula took some photos too.  She was also able to help Belle and Baby P get started with breastfeeding.  It was perfect!  After about an hour, the happy new family moved onto the nursery to continue bonding, while I got started on healing and resting in my room.  It was quite a different experience not having a baby to take care of, but I think I rather liked all the rest and relaxation that I got.

Fresno Surrogate Recovery Room Party

The first hours were a bit uncomfortable though.  The hospital was completely packed with women giving birth, so there were no rooms open for me to move on to recovery.  That meant I got to stay in labor and delivery.  Nice big rooms, but the beds aren't the best for an overnight stay.  That being said, it was a bit of a rocky night with an hour of sleep here and there.  My uterus hurt, my back hurt, and my pelvic bone hurt (same pain from before the birth).  But as the night wore on it seemed to get better and better and by 4am I was knocked out in a pretty good sleep.  Ahhhhhh!  Oh sweet sleep.  The next morning I was able to take a shower, put makeup on, and blow dry my hair all nice and curly.  Wow!  That was a first in all births.  Normally I'm so tired and out of it that I just wait till I get home... or a week after that even.  Haha!  I will say that I flooded out the whole bathroom taking my shower though.  Hmmmm... someone needs to talk to the architect about that one.  I even got to put on that super cute hospital gown I got from Birth Day Suit Maternity.  I may not have been able to wear it for the birth, but at least I looked great for the day after!  Belle and Adam came to visit me in my room a few times that day.  They even brought me a cute little hospital goodie bag full of yummy treats, champagne, and relaxing body products.  Thanks Belle & Adam!  My family and in-laws also came to visit me, as well as another friend, and a group of surrogates that were so sweet to come by and say hi.  My stay wasn't long though.  The hospital needed the bed, so I was released a good 5 hours early.  Yay!  Time to relax at home.

Flower Gifts

Being home has been so nice.  The first few days were a bit achy, but relaxing on my couch and bed was so much better than in a hospital.  I've been enjoying all the well wishes from friends and family, and even got flowers from Brian's boss and from Circle Surrogacy.  Belle, Adam, & Baby P on the other hand, had to stay one more night.  Poor them.  They didn't get a room, so they had to stay in the nursery.  Unfortunately there is no sleeping or eating in the nursery so needless to say, I'm sure they were VERY tired by the time they got to leave, and probably a bit hungry too.  I don't think they left Baby P's side very often.  Finally Thursday evening they too got to head home... or rather back to the hotel.  Oh sweet bed!  I'm sure they crashed pretty darn fast... before Baby P woke them up again.  Haha!  And so it begins.

On Saturday Brian, the kids, and I all went to visit the happy new family at their hotel.  Of course we came bearing food and couldn't wait to see how they were all doing.  Besides being extremely sleep deprived (aren't all new parents), it looked like they were doing great.  The whole room was set up like a home away from home, and Baby P was sleeping so soundly the whole time we were there.  Such a cutie!!!!!  We even got some great group pictures before heading out to let the new family rest some more.  I wish I could post them here for you all to see, but for now, I know that I'll hold them in my heart forever.

Visiting Belle, Adam, & Baby P

Sunday I made another stop by to see Belle, Adam, & Baby P with my mother in-law.  I must have been totally not paying attention when they talked about this week, because I didn't realize that it would be the last day I would see them.  Today they're heading out to San Francisco to finalize some legal work and hop on their flights.  Is it really over?  Has this journey really come and gone?  Oddly enough I'm not a sobbing mess like I thought I would be, but I'm sure when the hormones start kicking in, the realization that it's over will kick in.  I know it's not goodbye forever though.  They've already planned a trip back to California next February to visit us in Fresno, and then make a trip to Disneyland.  Oddly enough, we'd already planned a trip to Disneyland around the same time.  So funny!  I'm sure time will fly by and well see them once again, but till then... It's been a perfect ending with a perfect little family.  Congrats Belle, Adam, and Baby P!!!!!  I love you all!!!!  

I was going to post my belly progression on this post, but YouTube isn't liking my music selection.  I still need to wait for them to approve my using a song that I did not create.  Believe me, you don't want me to sing the song for you.  I guarantee that it won't sound as pretty.  Haha!  I'll post it soon.

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

Surro Files - 39 Weeks & Waiting, Waiting, Waiting...

The Bun

This week the baby is about the size of a watermelon (20 inches) and 7.25 pounds.  Ack!!!!  That's way too big for my belly.  Haha!  As baby prepares to join the outside world, they are continuing to build a layer of fat and slough off the outer layers of skin.  The vernix and lanugo are nearly completely gone although you may see some traces of it after birth.  The placenta is also still hard at work providing critical antibodies to help protect the baby from infections in the outside world.  Although, if breastfed, the baby will get many of his needed antibodies from breastmilk.

The Oven

This oven is about to burst, but the door doesn't seem to want to open.  Sheesh!  Someone call a locksmith!!!  I know we're still 6 days away from our due date, but everyone swore I would not last this long.  Guess I showed them unfortunately.  Haha!  I'm trying to cook the perfect souffle, and you just can't rush perfection.  Well, that's normally my motto anyways, but more about that in just a minute.  First I'd like to talk feet.  Yes, those babies are more like tanks right now.  Gah!  I hope they don't take long to go back to normal after the birth.  It's actually getting a bit uncomfortable to walk at times.  I can feel the pressure building up slowly and by the end of the day they are done.

The Happenings In the Kitchen

Lots going on this week!!!!  Or should I say not going on this week.  Depends on how you look at it.  Haha!  Well, Adam headed out on a flight to California on Wednesday while I had my next OB appointment and NST to monitor the baby.  Belle wasn't able to make it this time because she fell victim to the horrible heat of Fresno, CA.  Yep, she got heat stroke walking around town.  Boo!  She's feeling better now, but I'm sure that was no fun.  So I trekked it to the appointment alone.  I was a good solid 4 cm dilated at that point!!  Ack!  This baby is going to just fall out!!!  They're doing great though.  The NST went well and baby is tolerating life on the inside just fine, even with the three contractions I had during that time span.  At this point I just wanted to speed up the process a bit.  I figured Adam would be here in a few hours, so we might as well give nature a push.  I had my nurse midwife sweep my membranes.  Not so bad.  It hurt just a little.  Then I was on my way.

Well, contractions picked up pretty quickly after that and I freaked out.  Ack!!!!  Adam's still in the air and my doctor isn't on call till this weekend.  Maybe the sweep was a bad idea.  So I went to pick up the girls, went shopping at Target, picked up my hospital gown, and then went straight home to relax.  I didn't want this to happen today.  Took me the whole rest of the day to get the contractions to slow down to a halt.  I just basically vegged on the couch.  Now I'm thinking that was a mistake...

The next day I woke up to bloody show and lots of mucus plus all day (sorry if you didn't want to know that).  I thought for sure today was the day!!!!  I was having some contractions as well, but not a ton.  But Thursday came and went... and so did the 4th of July... and so did Saturday... and so did Sunday...  Yep, we're still here waiting.  Maybe I should have walked it out on Wednesday.  Oh well.  No looking back now.

4th of July with my Kiddos

Saturday night my doula came over to my house.  OMG!  It was heaven!!!!  We talked for awhile about the birth first.  My fears, concerns, how I saw things going, and things like that.  Then she gave me a massage with some essential oils, did lots of acupressure, worked some rebozo magic on me, and left me feeling refreshed and relaxed.  Oh so nice!!!!!!  I can't wait to pamper other mommies to be like this.  Did I tell you all that I opened up my own doula business this past week???  Yes!!!!  It's officially open.  You can check out my Love & Labor Birth Services web page or "like" Love & Labor on Facebook.  I'm so excited about it!!!!!

My doula and I doing rebozo work.

But back to waiting for baby.  Bell, Adam, and I went to see the movie "Tammy" on Sunday.  It was so funny.  I think baby thought they were missing out because I had a lot of contractions during it.  They wanted to burst out so they could see what was going on.  Haha!  Contractions stopped after the movie though.  Boo!!!

This morning we had another OB appointment.  Bell, Adam, and I all went to this one.  We got to listen to the heartbeat (sounded great!!), measured my belly (2 weeks ahead at 41 weeks), checked dilation (4-5 cm), and did another membrane sweep.  We also talked induction.  Adam needs to head home for a bit on Sunday and we don't want him to miss the birth or not get much time to bond with baby.  Now when I say head home for a bit... I mean all the way back to the UK.  Not just down the street.  So we scheduled to be induced on Saturday.  My doctor will be there and Adam will be there.  Then we got home and realized this just won't work.  Adam would only get a day to bond, plus my doula's husband is flying in that day after not seeing him for months.  If we're going to schedule this, might as well make it work for everyone.  So I just called back and hopefully they can get us in on Wednesday or Thursday.  Eeeeek!!!!!  So soon!!!!  Now normally I'm totally against induction for scheduling purposes.  I strongly believe that a baby will come when they are meant to and I think that induction just leads to problems in labor... but at the same time, I can't imagine a daddy not being there when their baby is born or having to leave so soon afterwards.  So we'll break my water and hope that gets things moving.

To tell you the truth, I'm trying really hard to get things going before then.  I went to the store and bought an enema.  Yep, more horrible information for you all.  I've never done one before and let me tell you, it's not an awesome experience.  Not horrible, but definitely different.  Unfortunately I still don't feel like anything is happening, so I might make another trip to the store for castor oil.  Yep, I'm that desperate at this point.  I guess we'll see what happens.

The Chefs

Belle and Adam are waiting patiently for the big day.  They're getting things prepared, legal work squared away, and just trying to enjoy their days together before 2 becomes 3.  Unfortunately they ran into a little stress along the way.  Their poor dog is having problems.  He can't walk well, and has a lump that might be cancer.  That's why Adam needs to head back.  He needs to get his dog in to get an MRI to check things out and then he'll be back to help with the baby.  Belle will be staying here though and they've been trying to set up for her sister to join her during Adam's leave.  So much to think about!  Who knew this would all come down at the same time.

Coming Soon !!!

July 8th - Monitoring Appt. - NST & Ultrasound to measure amniotic fluid.
July 9th-12th - Induction - It's not set in stone yet, but we will be inducing this week.
July 13th - DUE DATE!!!! - Adam heads back home

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

Stylish Labor & Delivery Hospital Gown... Check!!!

Dressed & Ready For The Big Birth Day!

Today I'm 38-1/2 weeks into our surrogacy journey.  Yep!  This baby will be here very soon.  I've never went a full 40 weeks with any of my children, and I don't expect to with this one either.  Yesterday we even had an OB appointment.  I'm already 4cm dilated and had my membranes swept.  Baby's mommy has been here a week getting everything ready, and daddy just arrived on a plane all the way from the UK.  My bags are packed (almost), and we're registered at the hospital.  We are so ready to go!!!! ... almost...

Ever since our doctor appointment yesterday I've been contracting on and off, and you know what was on my mind?  You would probably think excitement for the big day (yes, that was there).  You might think worry since the baby's daddy wouldn't be here for a few more hours (yep, I was thinking that too).  You might think disappointment since my doctor won't be on call till Friday (you'd be right again).  All those things were running through my head.  What was running through my head the most though?  You might laugh, but I was thinking "No!  Not yet.  I still have to go pick up my super cute hospital gown!!!!"  

Yep, this gown is birth ball approved!

It was a decision I had made just this week.  Sure, the regular hospital gowns are fine and dandy, but I've done that style 3 times now.  Back in February, this baby's mommy told me I should dress up for the occasion and wear whatever I want to.  Comfortable, glam, toned down, or dressed up... why not try something new?  I thought about it for months, but didn't really look for or purchase anything.  I even thought about sewing something for awhile, but being as busy as I am, that wasn't going to happen.  I even saw that another friend of mine had a pretty dress that she had made up just for the occasion.  Then this week I decided to check out what was available online.  I found a few sites, and then remembered that a local doula and her daughter also made maternity hospital gowns.  Bonus!  I love working with local businesses.  As soon as I checked out the Birth Day Suits website I knew I just had to have one!!!  So many to choose from though.  How would I ever choose in such a short amount of time?  Luckily the company is local, so I headed over there yesterday to try on a few and instantly fell in love with one the second I tried it on.  It was magic!

Nifty little snap down straps

I chose a beautiful black and white chevron dress in their Piper dress style.  It was no easy task though.  They have tons of fabric options and 8 gown styles that all look amazing!  I love how functional they are too.  For those that want something easy to get on and off, adjustable, plus easy access in case you need an epidural, the back crosses over and is secured with ties like a standard maternity gown.  For those that want to breastfeed, there are also snaps on the shoulder straps for easy access when breastfeeding.  I won't be breastfeeding, but I will be pumping in order to get all the benefits of breastfeeding.  And you can't ignore all the style that comes with this gown.  I love the pleated neckline, the pretty accent trim at the bottom, and the satin ribbon that you can tie just under your breasts.  That's my favorite part.  So much more flattering when you can accentuate the belly, although I hear some women tie the ribbon in their hair and leave the dress flowing.  

So now I'm officially ready for the big day!!!!  I can't wait for it to come.  Mommy and Daddy are here, I'm packed and ready to roll, and I have my gown ready for the ball (can you tell I'm watching Cinderella right now with that reference?).  Let's get this party started!!... soon.  Still waiting for my doctor to go on call.  Come on Friday!

____________________________________________________

If you want more information about how you too can get one of these awesome gowns, check out their official Birth Day Suit Maternity website, or browse some of the dresses they currently have up on their Birth Day Suit Maternity Etsy Page.  You know you want one!

Surro Files - 38 Weeks & Belle is Here!!!

The Bun

This week the baby is about the size of a pumpkin (19.75 inches) and 6.8 pounds.  Although the baby is full term with fully functioning organs, their brain and nervous system will continue to develop well into childhood and their teen years.

The Oven

Big, Big, Big!!!!  Haha!  That's my usual update isn't it?  Not only is my tummy big, but my feet are too.  Darn swelling!  The only time I've had swelling before was with Riley, and that was just the last week of pregnancy.  It doesn't hurt, but it does feel weird walking when your ankles have rolls and your toes are all smooshed together.

My super swollen feet.  So sexy!  Ankle bones are over rated.

The Happenings In the Kitchen

Belle is here!!!!!  Not without a few plane troubles as usual, but she's finally here.  I feel bad that traveling to California gives her bad luck every time.  This time her flight was cancelled, but luckily she was able to catch another one later that night, just in time for our doctor appointment the next day.

After only sleeping about 3 hours, Belle was at our house bright and early to help me load up all the baby stuff that she had shipped to my house.  It was like Christmas morning with lots of gifts piled high in my trunk, ready for her to unpack and get ready for the big day.  That would all have to wait though.  First, we had a date to see her little munchkin on ultrasound at our OB appt.  My girls came with us to the appointment.  They were pretty excited to go see what this little baby is looking like these days.  They finally called us back to do the ultrasound, but it was awhile before they would show us actual baby pictures.  First up was measuring the baby and amniotic fluid.  Well, turns out I have a lot of fluid and a fairly normal size baby at around (8 pounds right now).  Not too bad.  Linc was 8lbs 4oz when he was born.  Let's hope baby doesn't grow too much more, but in most cases these measurements are overestimated anyways.  Finally they got to the good stuff!  Hello baby!!!!  Well, it looks like Belle and Adam are expecting the cutest baby ever with the biggest cheeks that you ever did see!  Seriously cute!!!!  I just want to pinch them... softly of course.  Haha!  We got some great 3D pictures, but unfortunately the video didn't come out as great this time.  Boo!  Belle was in love with all the cute pictures and we just can't wait for the big day to get here.  After the ultrasound we had our OB appointment.  They weren't going to check dilation, but I asked them to.  So after all the checks here's what we're looking at...  I'm 151 pounds (gah!  passed that magic number I didn't want to pass), good blood pressure, and no protein in urine.  Baby's heartbeat was in the 120's - 130's, and my belly is measuring about 2 - 3 weeks ahead still, but it always is.  So as far as improvement... I'm now 3-4cm dilated and super soft!!!!!  Yep!  We're getting closer.  I'll be halfway done by the time we get into labor.  I'm still thick and baby is still fairly high, but those things could change in a flash.  We're still waiting on Group B Strep test results too.  Hope I'm negative. (Update: I'm negative.  Yay!)  I'm also swelling a bit in my feet.  They don't look like crazy big, but if you press in on them, the dent stays there for quite a long time.  Oh well, not much longer!!!  Overall a great appointment!  Belle couldn't be happier.  She's going to have a baby soon!!!

Well the next day my doctor's office called me.  They reviewed the ultrasound and there were some concerns.  I didn't get to talk with the doctor, but from what I gather, they are concerned about how much amniotic fluid I have.  My amniotic level is 25, and that puts me into the category of having Polyhydramnios.  I have a lot of the symptoms... shortness of breath, swelling of lower extremities (especially my feet and vulva), and a large tummy of course.  That being said, they're ordering 2 ultrasounds a week to measure the fluid levels and at the same time we'll be doing nonstress tests on the baby to see how they are doing (basically just monitoring their heartbeat for 20 min).  Our first one is today actually.  I'll jump back on here and update before I post this.  In most cases Polyhydramnios is pretty mild and doesn't cause problems, so I'm not too concerned, but at the same time I want the best for Belle and Adam's baby.  Hoping all keeps going well and we see this little angel very soon.

Well, I'm back from our first NST & Ultrasound to measure the amniotic fluid.  Looks like my fluid level went up again.  We're now at a 30.  Boo!  The nurse midwife said everything looks ok, but if my water breaks it'll be a disaster flood zone.  Just thought I'd warn anyone that might be hanging out around me for the next two weeks.  Maybe I should wear a sign that says "Flood Zone".  Seems like a good idea to me.  After the ultrasound we did the Nonstress Test (NST).  I basically just sat in a cushy recliner while they hooked me up to a heart rate monitor and a contraction monitor (just like when in the hospital).  Belle, her friend, and Linc were with me, so we got to listen to baby for a good 45 min before they finally unhooked me.  Wednesday we'll get to do it all over again. 

Linc and I at the NST

The Chefs

Belle is here!!!!!  She's been working on getting everything set up for the big day.  Lots of shopping, shopping, shopping.  Her best friend is here too, so I'm sure they're having lots of fun waiting for the big day.  Adam will be here Wednesday, then it's on!  We're officially on the lookout for the big day to come.

Coming Soon !!!

June 30th - Monitoring Appt. - NST & Ultrasound to measure amniotic fluid.
July 2nd - 38 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit plus an NST
July 2nd - Adam Gets Here - Adam gets here to wait it out for the big day.  We're all ready to go!
July 7th - Monitoring Appt. - NST & Ultrasound to measure amniotic fluid.
July 12th - 40 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.  We will NOT make it to this appointment!  Haha!
July 13th - DUE DATE!!!!

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

Surro Files - 37 Weeks And Dilated!

The Bun

Baby is now about the size of swiss chard (19.25 inches) and 6.3 pounds.  For those of you who think that swiss chard is a type of cheese, you are not alone.  I looked for swiss chard in the cheese isle for days, before I Googled it and realized it was a vegetable.  Haha!  Silly me.  This week baby is now considered full term!!!  That means all of the baby's organs should be fully developed and prepared for the outside world.

Baby is the size of swiss chard.  Haha!  Ok, maybe not this big.

The Oven

The oven is trying to hang on.  Only 3 more weeks... Or less!!!  I've changed my sleeping arrangement once again.  I still can't sleep on my side.  Believe me, I've tried.  I want to soooooooo bad, and so I have caved in a few times and just said, the pain I'd have the next day would be worth it.  Well, the last time I tried, the pain was so not worth it.  I was in pain the whole day, vs just the first 10 min of the day like usual.  So no more side sleeping for me.  Sitting up wasn't working well either though.  I'd stay up for hours sometimes just trying to get some sleep.  Well, now I do reclined back sleeping.  I basically prop my biggest pillows behind me and recline back so my blood flow is still good, but I'm not sitting all the way up.  It's not too bad.  I still want to roll over on my side, but I really try not to.  As little as 10 min on my side puts me in pain for awhile.  Boo!

My poor little feet are also swollen.  It used to just be when I went on long trips, but ever since my last trip, they just haven't went back down.  I wouldn't say they're marshmallow feet by any means, but for me they're pretty big.

Lastly, this little cutie is riding pretty darn low now.  They're always sitting on my bladder if not punching it at the same time.  Good times.  Haha!  I'm still in good spirits most of the time though.  I'm ready for the end, but I can last a few more weeks if I have to.

The Happenings In the Kitchen

This week we had our 36 week OB appointment.  I was so excited for this appointment because I knew that they would most likely check to see if I was dilated or not.  I know that it doesn't mean much.  After all, a woman that's not dilated at all could go into labor tomorrow and another woman dilated to 3cm could still be pregnant 3 weeks later.  Even so, I like to know that my body is doing something and it's gearing up to birth this baby.  First up was the weight check.  I'm now 147 (my normal weight is about 105 give or take a few pounds).  I then peed in my little cup, took my blood pressure, and waited for the nurse midwife.  When she got there we did the Group B Strep test (not fun).  It's basically checks to see if you have a certain bacteria in your vagina or rectum area that could cause an infection with bad side effects for the baby if it's born vaginally.  I've never had it before and fingers crossed I don't have it now.  After the test swab, she checked dilation, station, effacement, and all that other good stuff.  Well, looks like I'm dilated 2-3 centimeters and very soft!!!!  Baby is still high though (-3 or -2) and my cervix is still thick.  At first I was pretty darn excited about all the progress, but then I realized that I was dilated this much with my second two children, so I could still go the full 40 weeks.  She also checked the baby's heartbeat which is in the 130's as usual and I'm still measuring 2-1/2 - 3 weeks ahead.

The Chefs

Sorry, no update from Belle this week.  I'm sure she's going crazy trying to get ready to come out here.  She flies out tomorrow!!!!!  She'll be staying over in San Francisco for a night though, so she won't be here till Wednesday.  I can only imagine what's going through hers and Adam's minds right now.  I know they're still trying to sell the house, so that's a lot to take on.  Their dog hurt his leg, so they've been dealing with that all week.  Legal work for the pre-birth order still isn't done, so we've been trying to work out some of those kinks.  Then after finding out I was dilated already, we were all sent in a tizzy hoping that baby would stay in till the parents got here.  Looks like Adam will actually be coming out sooner than shown below, but I kept the date the same till we find out.  Belle's friend was also supposed to come out with her for the first week, but she ruptured her eardrum, so that's not going to happen.  Luckily her other best friend is going to be able to come out, so they can be excited together getting things ready for baby.  So crazy!!!  I might only have one more update before this baby is born. 

Coming Soon !!!

June 25th - Belle Gets Here - Belle gets here to wait it out for the big day.  Lots of stuff to do!
June 26th - 37 week OB Appt. - Growth Ultrasound & OB Visit.
July 2nd - 38 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.
July 2nd - Adam Gets Here - Adam gets here to wait it out for the big day.  We're all ready to go!
July 12th - 40 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.  We will NOT make it to this appointment!  Haha!
July 13th - DUE DATE!!!!

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

Surro Files - 36 Weeks for Father's Day

The Bun

This week the baby is about the size of a honeydew melon (18.75 inches) and 5.75 pounds.  The baby is still gaining weight and becoming rounder in appearance.  By the end of this week the baby will be considered full term!!!  The presentation of the baby is most likely head down (at least it was at our last doctor visit).  For babies that are not, your practitioner may recommend an external cephalic version, a technique to manually manipulate the baby into the head-down position (ouch!!!).

Photo by Belle & Adam

The Oven

Last week I let you know that my oven is breaking down.  Sleeping has become quite the challenge.  I would wake up each morning not able to walk because my pelvic bone had shifted out of place way too much.  Well this week I came up with a new way of sleeping.  With the help of 7 different pillows, I now sleep sitting up.  I find it kind of hard to stay in this position the whole night, but the nights that I have been able to, I have woke up feeling GREAT!!!!  No pain at all.  Last night I made the mistake of sleeping laying down again and OMG!  That was no good at all.  Back to my sitting up position tonight.

The Happenings In the Kitchen

Compared to most weeks, this week has been a pretty calm week.  Well, calm for us at least.  Haha!

First off, I wanted to show you my crazy sleeping nest that I talked about above.  I've got two pillows behind me to prop me up.  I've got my big noodle pillow which I form into a seat.  I have a small pillow behind my lower back.  I have one long pillow for me to wrap my legs around.  And then I have two big pillows to lay around me as needed or hug until I feel comfortable.  Brian likes to make fun of my millions of pillows, but it works, so what are you going to do?

My New Sleeping Nest

Most of the week I've been working on starting up my new doula business.  For those that don't know, a doula is a birth support person that helps a woman physically and emotionally during labor, delivery, and her first hours postpartum.  A doula also helps to answer any questions about pregnancy, labor, birth, breastfeeding, and newborns, to the best of her ability.  I'm really excited about this new journey and much of my time has been spent this week selecting a business name (Done!), designing a logo (Almost Done!), and working on my website (Under Construction...).  I can't wait to show you all the work I've been doing.  My goal is to have the website up and running by the 1st of July.

I also got a massage this week.  Oh so nice!!!!!!  Ok, I did have a little trouble since like I said above, my body doesn't like laying on its side anymore.  I'm sure the masseuse thought I was pretty crazy when it took me forever to roll over and forever to get off that table and dressed afterwards.  The massage itself was great though!!!!  I scheduled one more before this baby gets here.

This weekend was Father's Day!!!!!  Our girls were camping in Pismo with my in-laws this week, so Brian, Lincoln, and I all drove over to Pismo so we could have a nice Father's Day dinner.  The kids were all so excited to give Daddy their gifts.  Lincoln painted Brian a little frame that says I Love You Daddy.  I did the writing, but he did all the painting himself.  Both Reagan and Riley made their gifts at Color Me Mine.  Riley painted Brian a football chip and dip tray in the 49'ers colors, and Reagan painted a baseball mug in the Giants colors.  I got Brian a 49'ers mug and a Giant's mug (no I didn't paint mine).  I think he liked them all.  Father's Day success!!!!  We then took the girls home and left Linc so he could go camping for awhile.  When we got home the girls, Brian, and I all hit up the race track.  This was Brian and Reagan's first time racing, but Riley's already a pro.  Poor Brian and Reagan came in last, but Riley did pretty good.  No racing for me.  Boo!  Next time I guess.

Brian and the girls at the Racetrack for  Father's Day.

The Chefs (an update from Belle)

No update from Belle this week.  She's been busy busy busy getting ready for the trip out this way, plus her poor doggy just hurt his legs today and can't walk, so she's keeping him company right now.  I will say that I've gotten tons of shipments in the mail for Belle, Adam, and their baby though.  It's going to be like Christmas when they get here and get to open them all.  They will be all set for when baby gets here!  Oh, and I got an awesome gift from Belle this week!  It's a super cute canvas bag that says Doula on it.  I love it!!!!  It'll be perfect to carry around to each appointment or delivery.  Thanks!!!!

Coming Soon !!!

June 19th - 36 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.
June 24th - Belle Gets Here - Belle gets here to wait it out for the big day.  Lots of stuff to do!
June 26th - 37 week OB Appt. - Growth Ultrasound & OB Visit.
July 2nd - 38 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.
July 2nd - Adam Gets Here - Adam gets here to wait it out for the big day.  We're all ready to go!
July 12th - 40 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.  We will NOT make it to this appointment!  Haha!
July 13th - DUE DATE!!!!

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*