Surro Files - When Things Go Wrong

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Well this week started off great.  We spent the first half of the week at Disneyland.  It was my girls' end of school year trip.  We were all so excited.  The girls rode rides that they had never even come close to riding before.  They rode Splash Mountain, Star Tours, Indiana Jones, and Tower Of Terror!  I can't believe my girls are growing up so fast.  The first two rides were a hit, but the second two were still a bit too scary.  Even more amazing was that I rode the rides as well.  Having little kids means no big rides for me, so it's been quite a few years since I've been on anything scarier than It's A Small World.  I kept telling myself that I better get my rides in because the transfer was a week away and after that there's no more big rides for me for quite awhile... or so I thought.

Wednesday we headed home.  My sister and cousin headed up with us too so they could visit for a few days.  It was my cousin's first time to California so we were trying to show him the sites.  We opted for a trip to Yosemite on Thursday.  Before we headed out I had my monitoring appointment though so we all drove over and they walked around the hospital grounds while they waited for me.  I was a bit nervous for the appointment since my lining only went up about 2mm the week before, but the clinic changed my medication so I was hoping for big numbers this week.  Nothing prepared me for the number the ultrasound nurse gave me though.  Not only did my lining not jump up like I had wanted it, but it had plummeted to 2mm!!!!  How was that even possible???  I started out at 3.6, went up to 5.4, and then went down to a 2!  My heart sank instantly as I knew this was very bad news.  I just don't know what happened.  I took all my medications like clockwork.  I didn't bleed or spot at all during my cycle.  It just took me completely by surprise.  I was in denial, a bit stressed, and a bit depressed.  What was I going to tell Belle and Adam?  I promised I would e-mail ASAP after the appointment.  Well, I e-mailed and let me tell you, it was probably the worst e-mail I've ever sent.  Belle was supposed to be flying out the next day for the transfer and I was all set to fly out a few days after that.  I guess you can't plan anything when it comes to surrogacy.  I know that now.  Silly me for thinking this would be easy.  Belle and I tried to keep our hopes up that the transfer could be saved, but later that day I got the message of doom as the clinic confirmed that the transfer indeed was cancelled.  Boo!

I was down in the dumps for the rest of the day, but Belle as usual beams positive vibes and assured me that all would be ok and what happens is meant to be.  A few tweaks to the cycle and we can fix what went wrong this time.  This is one of the pluses of having a couple that has been through this all before.  Belle and Adam have been through 5 rounds of IVF themselves and know that it's no easy task.  If it were then we wouldn't be here today.  We will get past this!  We will transfer!  We will get pregnant!  And they will get their baby!

So what's up next?  Well the clinic told me that I could discontinue my Lupron injections, but I do need to continue my Estradial pills (by mouth now instead of vaginally).  In addition to the Estradial, I also need to start taking Endometrian (HUGE pill vaginally).  They want to build up my lining so I have something to shed when I get my period.  I'll take these medications till Thursday.  After that I should get my period.  At that point I'll give the clinic a call to discuss my next cycle.  I'm not sure when we plan to transfer, but I do know that they want to try a natural cycle.  I'm not sure exactly what that means, but from what I've heard, it's basically a cycle without (or with minimal) medications.  My body will just do it's own thing.  I'll know more in a week though.  I might even postpone my next update till Tuesday so I can let you all know what's going on.

On a more positive note... The egg donor is looking great and the eggs will be retrieved on TODAY in order to make embryos.  Yay!  That is exciting news!  At least something is going right.  Let's hope we get back on track on my side soon.  FX FX FX!!!!

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed to protect the identities of those involved in this journey