Monday, June 2, 2014

Surro Files - 34 Weeks & Becoming a Doula

Surrogacy 34 weeks
The Bun
Baby is now about the size of a butternut squash (17.75 in) and 4.75 pounds.  The waxy protective coating, vernix, is becoming much thicker this week as the lanugo continues to shed and may be almost completely gone by now.  Inside baby, the lungs are continuing to mature in preparation for breathing in the outside world.

34 Weeks Butternut Squash
Photo by Belle and Adam

The Oven
Feeling pretty good this week.  I did do a lot of driving so my feet swelled up a bit, but other than that I've been feeling great!  Maybe it's because of my new routine.  I've started adding in my daily "getting ready for labor day" exercises.  Every day I do 25 pelvic tilts 3x a day, tailor sitting (butterfly sitting) 3x a day, squatting 3x a day, and 10 kegels 3-10 times a day depending on how many times I think to do them... just thought about it... ok, and done.  Haha!  Hopefully all this prepping gets my pelvis nice and open with baby in just the right position so we have a nice easy birth.

Pregnant belly at 34 weeks

The Happenings In the Kitchen
Another very busy week for me!  Surprised?  Probably not.  I'm go go go...

Last Monday Brian and I took the girls to a Giants baseball game in San Francisco.  Now I'm not a sports fan, but it is kind of fun if you go there in person.  Cheering, food, being outside, dressing up in the teams colors... it all makes for a great day.  Unfortunately the Giants lost, but we all had fun and really that's all that matters.  I even found a team shirt that would cover this big belly... almost.  Haha!

Giants Game
Fun at the Giants Game

Tuesday I had another meeting with our doula.  She thought it would be a great time to just go over the emotional part of the birth to come.  It's going to be a very new experience for me to go through labor and delivery for a baby that is not mine, and she wanted us to work through that before the big day so we can prepare and think through how this will all go.  I've always known in my heart that I will not grow attached to this baby that I know is not mine, but that doesn't mean that I won't be sad when it's all over and I will need a way to create closure for this amazing journey that we all have been on for so long.  In the end I've decided that just seeing Belle and Adam with their baby right after the birth is what I need.  This new amazing family, bonding skin to skin as one, nurturing and loving, knowing that I helped to create that family and feeling forever grateful that they allowed me and trusted me with such an important role in their lives.  I need to see those first moments together, to see their love, and I know that I will be ok.  More than ok.  I will feel complete, with my heart filled, and no sorrow.  That's how I hope this big day will go.  Have I ever said how thankful I am that my doula is also a psychologist??  Definitely one of the main reasons I picked her.  She's great!  The session went great and we also got to talk about my use of the Hypnobabies program and how that will work during labor and delivery.  We're actually going to do another visit, just to test it out after I've finish all the classes in my book.  Let's hope it works!

Most exciting this week was my DONA doula training class!!!  I've been looking forward to it for awhile.  Years actually.  Friday through Sunday, I went to class from 8am - 6pm learning the most amazing things about pregnancy, labor, birth, postpartum care, and of course about being a doula.  It was so great to meet the 6 other ladies in there that had the same dreams as me... to help mothers (and surrogates) go through this amazing moment where baby enters the world.  I want these moments to be filled with love, education, and support, and I feel that this class really helped me to learn how to give that to my future clients.  I know that birth is a very unpredictable thing, and we can't control it or always get what we want, but I hope to make the birth that does evolve a happy one that parents will look back upon with fond memories and no regrets.  As of today, I'm now a doula!  Still working to become a certified doula, but heading in the right direction and that feels great.  Below I posted a picture of our wonderful group, plus my perfect birth drawing, and the beautiful doula beads necklace that was given to me by Debbie, our instructor.  Thanks Debbie!

My perfect birth drawing, Doula birth beads necklace, & Our wonderful training group with instructor.

The Chefs (an update from Belle)
"This week has been another busy week, getting ready for the summer. Flights have been booked, hotels are booked, car rentals (mostly) booked, and travel plans written out in full!  One exciting thing to mention was our second hotel booking, in which the hotel called and asked if we would like a crib for our little one! How sweet and exciting is that!!! This week I also started my Adoptive Breastfeeding Protocol, which has been interesting to say the least; waking up every 3 hours to try and increase the 'supply'. Now there are only 3 weeks left until we are back in California!" - Belle

Coming Soon !!!
June 5th - 34 week OB Appt. - Just a routine visit.
June 25th - Belle Gets Here - Belle gets here to wait it out for the big day.  Lots of stuff to do!
July 2nd - Adam Gets Here - Adam gets here to wait it out for the big day.  We're all ready to go!

Don't forget to check out my "Surrogacy" tab at the top of this page to catch up on any posts you might have missed

*Some of the names in this post have been changed and faces blocked out to protect the identities of those involved in this journey*

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